ANNB: This is your first “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff” book in nine years. Why now and why this topic? 

KC: The "Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff" book series is full of tried and true advice and has been on coffee tables and night stands, and in libraries for 15 years.  It’s a small book that helps people make big shifts in their lives. And now their kids are at the age where they are sweating the small stuff too.  Every ten years, there is a new group of people ready for the timeless wisdom of the "Don’t Sweat" tradition and that’s why I am adding a new book to the series. "Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff for Moms" has the same commonsense approach and is current, setting it apart from the "Don’t Sweat" guidebook released years ago. Kids haven’t changed that much but the world has. Technology and the Internet have changed family life and the issues bombarding our kids and moms today are many.  This book focuses on how moms can be inspired to be the best they can and also maintain a separate identity as an empowered, modern woman.

ANNB: You’ve been called an 'unyielding believer of living in the moment with an attitude of gratitude and finding happiness in life.' Can that be learned or does someone have to be born with those traits?
KC: I think people are born with a proclivity for happiness or unhappiness, but both of these are impacted greatly by the life we practice.  Life is no different than a sport; it takes practice to get good at it.  Your attitude can shift with your thoughts and beliefs about life as well as your mental and physical health.  Adopting an attitude of gratitude can be learned and is all about noticing what’s right in your life and focusing on those things instead of what’s wrong.

ANNB: How can someone get started “living in the moment?”
KC: Living in the moment is something we are born with, but most of us unlearn this quality and have to practice presence to get good at it again later in life.  Our minds get busy as do our schedules.  Creating space for stillness and quiet isn’t necessarily practical or part of our American training but it is necessary to learning how to embrace the moment.  Being present is one of the keys to true and lasting inner peace and contentment.  It is in the spaces between our thoughts that we are present; all it takes is a single breath to bring the moment into focus, and we can all practice that!  

ANNB: Your book advises how to be "a mom and not a friend." Is that something you struggled with raising your own children?

KC: I did not struggle with this issue of being a friend over a mom.  I knew that my girls had friends to fill that role of ‘girlfriend,' and quite frankly, I had my own girlfriends too.  What my girls needed was a solid role model and mother figure that they could respect and trust as a guide and mentor to lead and love them with discipline. Friendship comes later with kids.

ANNB: The term "helicopter parent" is popular these days. What can those who hover too close to their kids learn from your new book? 
KC: Hovering too close can disable children and also can lead to a sense of entitlement. I think parents today need to let their kids fall down a little before jumping so quick to save them from every fall.  It’s a lot shorter fall and closer to the ground when you are 10, than say, when you are 20.  If kids forget an assignment or their gym shoes or soccer cleats, well, maybe they ought to lose the opportunity that comes with remembering their responsibilities.  Doing too much for our kids can actually harm and disable them later in life when they have to show up or they lose big.

ANNB: What did you personally learn about being a mother in writing this book?
KC: While writing this book, I was reminded of just how crazy a job being a mom is and all the hats we wear.  I learned how much I know to be true sitting from the vantage point of looking back.  I know that being a mom will test everything about you bringing out your best and showing you areas of falability too.  It’s a big job with small joys leading to endless possibilities.  

ANNB: Is this book good for moms of "grown" children? Why or why not? 
KC: I think this book is good for all moms because there are chuckles of understanding for moms of older kids and chapters to help her transition too.  Once a mom, always a mom!

ANNB: Why do you think this book has a universal appeal?
KC: This book has universal appeal for the same reason all the Don’t Sweat series does.  The series of books have principles for happiness based on mental health and well-being that transcend cultural differences and are universal to all people.

ANNB: Where can we see you talk about the book and/or sign books in the Bay Area in the coming weeks/months?
KC: Check out http://www.kristinecarlson.com/healing/dont-sweat-the-small-stuff-for-moms for all the latest information on upcoming events.

ANNB: What’s up next for you?
KC: Living life.  Sharing.  Loving my grandkids. Joy. -- KB

My quirky passion for music led me to the glorious songs of Andy Padlo’s fourth album, Buffalo Wedding Andy Padlo, a singer songwriter from the Bay Area, released his newest album recently and it is a fortunate find. An eclectic blend of several different instruments along with memorable, heartfelt lyrics makes this 79-minute album a real gem.

ANNB: Your songs are so varied in style that it’s difficult to label your album’s genre. How would you describe your music?

AP: I have trouble with this, since I grew up listening to all kinds of music that was played on FM radio. Dj's had more freedom to put on whatever they liked, and you could hear a pretty broad spectrum of styles. Artists and songs weren't so separated by such strict marketing divisions as they are now. I guess the most common label for my songs and style would be either "singer-songwriter" or "alt-country" though some people have called it "americana." I don't really know. I guess it's all a mish-mash of stuff I've listened to all my life, from the Beatles to Bluegrass to Hank Williams to Leonard Cohen to The Replacements.

ANNB: Which song in the album was your favorite to write, and why?

AP: Each was my favorite at the time I wrote it--they came one after the other through the course of a year. But I'm most satisfied with "Kiss of Life." It seemed to write itself.

ANNB: How did you meet the other musicians who helped provide the additional instrumentation in the album?

AP: I worked closely with Stephen Ehret, who's an artist and musician, and I met several great folks through him. I also brought in young performers who were either students of mine in the past at School of the Arts in San Francisco, or are current students. We have some amazing talents there. One of the two drummers on the CD, Scott Eberhart, is in a band of his own and is also the director of the media department at School of the Arts.

ANNB: What other bands or artists influence your work? Do you have any musical role models who you look up to?

AP: A friend of mine had been slipping some new -- or at least new to me -- music into my music collection the past year, since I've been sort of out of touch with what a lot of independent artists have been up to. I was definitely inspired by The National, Broken Social Scene and some other groups making great music. I'm also a life-long fan of Bob Dylan, Leonard Cohen, Pavement, John Hiatt, and The Band, so those guys all have something to do with the way I write.

ANNB: Did you always have a goal of becoming a musician? Were there any other professions you chased when you were a child?

AP: I've been pursuing this goal most of my life, but I also always wanted to be a writer.

ANNB: Where do you see your music career in five years?

AP: I always hold out the hope that I'll build a larger audience of fans, be able to get out and perform more. I'll keep writing, recording regardless until somebody pulls the plug.

ANNB: Do you have any interesting strategies to aid you while songwriting?

AP: Most of the time I begin with a line, a bit of a lyric, and start playing the guitar, noodling around until something clicks. The only real strategy I have is to not get in my own way, creatively, not to try and force something, and instead just allow my ear to get along with my brain. I'm usually most energized in writing by a turn of phrase that seems to have potential to lead to a full lyric. Lately I haven't worried about telling any story, or having a clear moral or whatnot. I "feel my way" more, work more abstractly, and try to get a complete emotional picture in the song rather than a direct message or "package."

ANNB: You’ve come a long way since your first self-titled album. How do you think your music has changed?

AP: Maybe I've just decided to do whatever feels right and not try to fit someone's expectation so much about a song. I definitely want my songs to sound good, to be liked, and to stand the test of time but I'm also not worried if they don't fit into an expected pattern or style.

ANNB: What was your first time performing like?

AP: Very first? I was 10, I was performing with a small group we'd put together to promote recycling. We traveled to different elementary schools. It was great fun. Later I played in a band in high school. Some nights were better than others. I've played for some relatively large audiences (large for me anyhow) and for as few as one person on a slow night in a bar where the owner kept the ball game on the tv. I guess as long as someone is into what I'm doing it's all right!

ANNB: What tips do you have for aspiring singer-songwriters?

AP: Keep writing, keep working on building a good collection of powerful songs, play all the time, wherever you can, open mics, parties, get a wide variety of feedback to help you shape your work. What do people respond to? What doesn't work so well? Learn to play your instrument. Read all you can about other songwriters, find out how they developed their careers. And don't waste people's time with half-baked songs: people respond to songs that tell the truth. It's a tradition that goes back to the beginning of civilization. A great song gets to the heart of what it means to be alive, and can mean so much to all who hear it. And, of course, write about what you know.

Melody Moteabbed enjoys writing, fashion design, discovering new music artists, theater, and cats. More of her writing can be found in the Olympian at http://www.cvhsolympian.com.

Lauren Lindberg is a busy woman. She’s in college, she’s making movies and she’s making history. As a teen finalist in the Seventeen Magazine “Pretty Amazing” contest, Lindberg, a Danville resident, was featured in the magazine last year. Now she is coming to speak at the Soroptimist International of the San Ramon Valley’s  8th annual She’s All That conference for middle school girls on Feb. 11.We checked in with Lindberg and found out a little more about her pretty amazing life.

 
ANNB: At 18, you already have a page on the Internet Movie Data Base (IMDb) listing, a spot in Seventeen Magazine, and screenings of your films at 24 national and international film festivals. What is the key to your success?

LL: The key to success is finding something you are passionate about.  For me, I have found my passion in documentary filmmaking, and in highlighting important social issues. The page on IMDb, spot in Seventeen and screenings at 24 film festivals are results of the many hours and hard work that I have put into my filmmaking.  The happiness I feel when making movies is my biggest reward. I think all these factors have helped me make films that have resulted in all the recognition.
 

ANNB: Tell us about where you were and what you were doing when you learned you were selected as a finalist in Seventeen Magazine’s “Pretty Amazing” real girl cover contest. What did it mean to you?

LL: I applied for the contest on a whim.  I was up late one night and saw an advertisement in Seventeen, and thought “why not? I could use a scholarship!” Several months later, in April, I received an email saying I was moving to the next round. I was shocked!  But I still didn’t think I would be selected--- Seventeen had all the potential girls make numerous videos and answer interview after interview.  I didn’t think I had a chance! Then, while on a bus during a class field trip, I got a call from Anne Shoket, the editor of Seventeen, who told me I was selected as one of the five finalists and I would be flown to New York. I was extremely excited, but even then, I did not realize the immense impact the trip would ultimately have on me. 

ANNB: Tell us about the cover photo shoot, makeover and meeting the judges (I think it was the judges?) in New York. What was that like?

LL: From the beginning of the trip to the end, they treated all five of us like celebrities.  We were met at the airport by limos, we got our hair done at an incredibly fancy salon, and our makeup was done everyday by professional makeup artists, who were used to doing makeup on the biggest stars. We also got to actually meet some celebrities: Anne Shoket, Jared Eng (of Just Jared)  and Miranda Cosgrove, of iCarly.  Because I had grown up reading Seventeen and Anne’s Editors letter in every issue, I had watched “iCarly” and “Drake and Josh”.  Even so, meeting them actually surprised me.  Anne Shoket was so poised and elegant, Miranda was just the sweetest girl. Jared was very relatable to me, because of the way that he started small and built his celebrity blog by doing what he loves, just like I’ve done.

ANNB: What do you hope to share at the “She’s All That” event to inspire young girls?

LL: Because I’m a part of Reach Out’s National Youth Council, my eyes have been opened to how many teens actually struggle with issues similar to what I went through a few years ago.  I went through a difficult time when I suffered from depression. However, when I started making movies, I discovered that I could use filmmaking as a microphone to bring awareness to different issues, and help other people find their voices.  I feel like I have a purpose. There are so many girls today that go through depression and think there is no hope. I want to let them know that there is always a way out, and that there is so much to live for. Because I was able to overcome my struggle with depression, I have realized how important it is to get my message out and so I stress the importance of finding and exploring your passion. 

ANNB:  Tell us about how you got started making films.

LL: I started making movies when I was around 9 years old. I would invite my friends over and we would make scripts, dress up, and act out silly stories.  In 8th grade,  I joined a video production class at my school and learned how to edit.  I used this newfound knowledge to create a remake of Avril Lavigne’s music video ‘Girlfriend,’ which since then has hundreds of comments and has been viewed more than 55,000 times.  

ANNB: You have so much going on right now, how do you juggle it all? What advice will you give on this topic at the She’s All That conference?

LL: I am still learning a lot about time management, and have pulled a few all-nighters since I’ve started college, however, what I’ve found is that staying ahead is key. At SAT, I will stress the importance of staying on top of things, and my advice for keeping a low stress level, and getting stuff done well and on time! The other thing that I have found is that whenever I do my absolute best at something, it turns out well. It’s when I rush through something, or don’t give something my best shot that things turn out just o.k. LL: You have shared your struggles with attention deficit disorder as well as depression.

ANNB: How did you break through that and what advice do you have for other teens/young women dealing with that?
 

LL: During sophomore year, I went through some drastic emotional changes.  I withdrew from everyone and everything. Although I was miserable, I figured that it was just the way I was.  My teachers began to notice this change and urged me to see a doctor.  Once I discovered that I had ADD and depression, I no longer felt like I was trapped in that state, but that I could do something about it.  I began working with my teachers, and they helped me think of ways that I could work around my ADD and be successful in their class.  As I began to do better in school, my mood began to lift. I learned that I could take something I am passionate about, filmmaking, and use it to empower myself and others.  I have learned about the importance of not giving up.  I want to stress that if you ever feel hopeless, know that it is not permanent.  There are people who understand and so many resources that can help you.
 

ANNB: You are studying filmmaking at Chapman University and hope to be a filmmaker. How is that going and what are you working on now?

LL: I have completed my first semester at Chapman and I love it.  Because of the huge adjustment from high school, I used my first semester to get adapted to all of the changes and focus on my schoolwork, but next semester I will have the opportunity to really expand in the filmmaking area.  I am taking my first hands-on filmmaking class and I am excited to figure out what I will do next!

ANNB: We understand that the The Factory, a youth program sponsored by the Bay Area Video Coalition in Oakland, was very helpful to you. Tell us about that?
 

LL: Because filmmaking is what ultimately pulled me out of my slump, I did not want to stop making films when the video production class at my school was canceled after my junior year.  As soon as I joined The Factory, I became aware that it was a place where I could truly grow as a filmmaker.  The Factory not only supplied me with equipment I needed, and insight from fellow filmmakers and instructors, but it also provided me with the opportunities that inspired me to focus on making films that empower change.  The Factory helped me distribute my films to different film festivals, and even funded trips so that I could go see my films screen.

ANNB:  What other message do you have for teens these days?

LL: Everyone has so much potential. Don’t be scared to reach for your goals, and pursue your dreams.
Also, we are very lucky that we live in today’s time period. So much of what we do is based upon using technology, and there probably has never been a better time to be a girl---any girl of any age can make a blog, publish a book, make a music video, put something on youtube, or start a charity. Every girl can pursue her dreams! Whatever it is that inspires you, go for it!  --JYP

The She's All That conference is from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. Sat. Feb. 11 at San Ramon Valley High School, 510 Danville Blvd. in Danville. For more information, call 925-519-0754 or email This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it . Pre-registration is required and classes will be filled on a first-registered basis. After Lindberg's talk, girls will attend three workshops from a list that includes sessions on talking to boys, self defense, relating to parents, hip hop, cyber safety and personal style. Workshops for parents are also available. For more information, visit: http://www.soroptimist-sr.org/

Julie Youngblood Perales, a Soroptimist, has been recruiting top talent nationally for Fortune 500 companies for the last 10 years. She has been a senior recruiter for Toll Brothers Home Builders in San Ramon for the last 6 years and also enjoys individually coaching and advising people who are in a career transition and job search mode. Contact her through at tellusyournews@gmail.com.

In 2012, we will be featuring more stories of Inspirational people doing what they love to do. We're wrapping up 2011 with a chat with Tasha Bartholomew, a Hayward woman who first began walking the runways and posing for the camera this summer after going to an open casting call for the 8 Plus Divas "Diary of a Curvy Diva" Fashion Show in Oakland. Here is a little more about what she is doing and where she hopes to go with her new plus-size modeling passion.

ANNB: How and when did you first become interested in plus-size modeling?
TB: I’ve been interested in plus-size modeling for at least five years now, but I’ve always loved fashion. I only decided to pursue modeling last summer when I saw an ad for a fashion show called “Diary of a Curvy Diva” that was presented by the ladies of 8 Plus Divas in August. I was excited to see a plus-size fashion show come to Oakland and wondered whether they were going to need models. So I checked their website and saw that they were going to hold an open casting call for the show and that’s when I decided to give it shot.

ANNB: Tell us a little about your experiences so far, such as what shows and shoots you have done?
TB: I’ve been fortunate to have done the 8 Plus Divas “Diary of a Curvy Diva” Plus Fashion Show, as well as the fashionART Santa Cruz Runway Show in September where I walked for plus designer Jill Alexander Designs. I have done several photo shoots, including an outdoors shoot at Lake Merritt in Oakland and a Pin-Up Girl photo shoot that took place on the beach in Alameda.
 

ANNB: Is walking the runway scary or do you feel you are a natural?
TB: Honestly, I feel very comfortable when I’m on the runway. Maybe it’s because I have a natural strut when I walk around every day. I do get little butterflies in my stomach before each show, but they tend to disappear the second I hit the runway.
 

ANNB: What types of clothes/accessories do you most like to model?
TB: I like to model everything, but I do tend to favor dresses. I especially like to rock cool accessories like belts, big earrings and bangles. Accessories can really make an outfit come alive. One item I haven’t really modeled yet is hats. I adore hats and would love to model them in a show someday soon.

ANNB: Tell us why the company you are working with 8Plus Divas is a good "fit" for you and others interested in plus-size modeling?
TB: 8 Plus Divas is a wonderful company because they really celebrate the curvy woman’s body, regardless of size or height. Many people may not know this, but even in mainstream plus-size modeling there are still certain standards models have to abide by. For example, they still prefer models to be at least 5’7 or 5’8 in height and they prefer models not to be over a size 18. Most models used in major ad campaigns tend to be on the smaller side of plus-size, such as a size 10, 12 or 14. 8 Plus Divas gives models such as me, who may not be the right height or size for the mainstream plus modeling world, an opportunity to show that we are just as fashionable, beautiful and sexy as our counterparts.  
 
ANNB: Are you modeling with a message? How do you hope your modeling is working to encourage other plus-size, beautiful women to embrace their bodies?
TB: Yes, I’m modeling with a message for plus-size women and also for women in general and that is to love your body and curves no matter what size you are. I have many female friends and family members, of all sizes, who still struggle with body issues. So I just think it’s important that whether you’re a size 6 or 16, that you love yourself unconditionally and unapologetically.

ANNB:  Where do you hope to go with plus-size modeling?
TB: Honestly, I’m not really sure where I want to go with plus-size modeling. I have a successful career in public affairs, and I see modeling as something fun that I’m doing on the side right now. Although I’m pretty new to the industry, I’ve been fortunate to also do some fashion blogging for the 8 Plus Divas website, in addition to starting my own fashion blog.

ANNB: What is your background outside of modeling?

TB: I have a journalism degree from San Francisco State University and worked as a professional journalist in the Bay Area for seven years before I decided to change careers five years ago. Since then, I’ve been working in the public affairs department for a public transit agency in the Peninsula. 

ANNB: What have you learned about body image, nutrition and healthy lifestyles since starting this career?
TB: I’ve learned that even as a plus-size model, it is still important to eat properly and exercise to stay healthy and toned.

ANNB: Where can we see you next? 

TB:  I am a brand ambassador for 8 Plus Divas, so I can be seen at many of their upcoming events. I also have more fashion blogs coming for 8 Plus Divas at www.8plusdivas.com, as well as my own blog page http://misstashabplusmodel.blogspot.com/. Lastly, I have a few fashion shows coming up in 2012, so please read my blog to find out more details. --KB

Close up photo (left) courtesy of Tony Sparks, photo in hat (middle right) courtesy of  La'Keela Smith Photography and  picnic scene (top left) courtesy of YellowBubbles Photography.